Rethinging

At the barn yesterday, I discovered that one of the old barn members stole a bunch of stuff from the tack room. All the english saddles are gone, and my big bag of training supplies are missing. I was able to use one of her english saddles, and she lt me use her own helmet as well. So now that she left, I have to ride in a western saddle. Which I guess is not horrible for trail rides, but I'd rather have a smaller saddle that I can feel the horse more. And I do not have a helmet, so lets hope nothing stupid happens.
With this thought, I started wondering how I will do my online courses, if I don't have my training supplies, I don't have a helmet and I don't even have a saddle. So, I have to either buy that, which I was already stressing about all the money I'm going to have to use in such little time for education and medical stuff. So, maybe I should just move away and get a dorm and go to school? Maybe it would be easier.. since they would have the horses to provide me, and riding equipment. Just, if I do this, I'll need help... and I don't have that.
Seriously, why is it so hard for me to just get an education. It's like everything is getting in the way to make what I want to do harder than it already was. Am I bringing this on myself?